Life / Mind

On Resentment, Guilt and Forgiveness….

Hello my lovely People!

Today I’m digressing from my previous pattern of writing book reviews and talking about something more serious. I have always intended, as I stated in my first post, to write on a diverse range of topics. And today I believe is the day to begin.

Growing up in South Asia, I grew up learning that negative and intense emotions are like fire, they burn you up on the inside. That however, was something I never fully understood, after all how many times in a day do we feel such emotions? Anger? Resentment? Jealousy? Envy? And how many times do they cause lasting harm? Of course emotions like anger do cause harm, we lash out, we say things we do not mean that we regret afterwards. But emotions burning you up? Slowly? 

Of course, we do understand that these emotions are capable of leading us to do terrible things. We’ve read it in novels, seen it on television, read it in poetry. These emotions make for emotional tragedies, incredible villains and heroes. But most of us are incapable of understanding the true magnitude of such feelings until we come across them ourselves. 

When I talk about coming across anger and resentment here, I don’t mean having these emotions targeted towards you. After all, the only thing most of us get out of that is a feeling of self-righteousness, and a belief that the other person is in the wrong. No, what I mean here is that it is only when you find yourself holding on to anger and resentment that you truly understand what it means to be burning from the inside. 

Unfortunately holding onto resentment and anger or even guilt does not lead to any good outcome. The emotions eat away at you like a poison until you find that you’re unable to recognise your own self. These emotions leave you paralysed and unable to live your life to the fullest. The only way out is then to let go. 

I have found myself holding onto to resentment after certain incidents for the other people that were involved while blaming myself at the same time. It was then that I learnt that holding onto negative emotions does no one any good. And one must learn to let go if one is to live.

Letting go involves forgiveness! You must forgive not only others but also yourself. 

A few days ago I  was talking to a friend and she said “I love how you channel yourself” even in  negative situations”. And I realized that perhaps that is the answer. 

You must learn to channel yourself and take control of your feelings rather then letting them drown you in emotion. And above all, you must learn to let go and to grow, to be comfortable in ones own capabilities and to live the best you can. That is the best you can do!

For all of my lovely people out there, channel yourself in every situation. Find out who you are and be the best you can be. I wish you luck in your endeavours. 

 Much Love! 
The Woman Out of Time

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